How not to be afraid to kiss you. I'm afraid to kiss a guy: what to do? non-obvious reasons for refusing to kiss

What is the companion of love? What is the beginning of a love relationship? What can no couple in love do without? Of course, no kissing!

At the first kiss, the question creeps in, is everything going right? Teenage girls try to find information in magazines and books on how to kiss properly. Boys look at this question easier. They rely on nature and intuition. However, it is worth knowing: a kiss is a kiss of strife. A passionate kiss in a long-term relationship differs from the first timid and timid one. To make it clear how to kiss, it is necessary to consider the features of kisses.

Young boys and girls are afraid of the first kiss, although they are waiting impatiently. With such a kiss, there are only movements of the lips, the time has not yet come for tongue games. The lips of the partner (partner) should gently touch the lips of the beloved or beloved, the movements should be soft, gentle, light, as if retracting. The ability to kiss well implies the ability to properly hug and use hands. Sometimes men already at the first kiss try to give free rein to their hands, this is unacceptable. The first kiss is for that and the first to be virginal and tender. Stroking the partner's face is allowed, although you should not get carried away, however, it is also impossible to stand with your hands down. The guy can lightly hug his partner around the waist, and in response, she can put her arm around her beloved by the shoulders. The first kiss should not last long, the main thing is that it be gentle.

Many girls often say that they absolutely do not know how and do not know how to kiss a guy. But it is difficult to agree with this, because everyone can kiss, only not everyone tried to do it. A kiss is not some unusual gift, but a natural ability of a person. It is only necessary to develop this skill.

Still, before kissing for the first time, it is better to practice. The kissing technique should be at least slightly rehearsed with the movements of the lips in the air. However, it is unlikely to succeed in guessing what a kiss with a guy will actually be. Therefore, it is better to completely forget at the time when you kiss for the first time for real about all the learned movements, how to do it correctly, and rely only on your feelings and sensations. Your emotions will allow you to choose the right path.
It is necessary during the kiss to touch the guy as much as possible, try to touch many parts of the body. But remember that the first kiss simply has to be romantic, and not at all right, and in a hurry, so you shouldn't. Also, do not strive to set records for the duration of the kiss. Let this kiss be the most tender.
Kissing is an incredibly enjoyable process, but not everyone can learn to enjoy it the first time. This is due to the fact that too much attention is paid to their actions, assessment of the situation. But as soon as you get rid of all these thoughts, you immediately begin to understand how pleasant it is to kiss. Therefore, it is better to immediately drive away unnecessary thoughts from yourself, relax and completely surrender to the process.
While we are kissing, substances that elevate mood, give energy and cheerfulness enter our brain with blood. However, the psychology of a kiss suggests that all this will be pleasant only if you kiss with your loved one. Only then will it be pleasant and easy for you, and his lips will seem the most delicious.
Don't be upset if you don't know how to kiss. For training, gently move your tongue over your own lips, fold it into a tube, turn the lollipops over in your mouth, breathe through your nose - and everything will work out. On the advice of psychologists, you need to imagine everything in detail in your imagination in advance. This will make you feel confident.

You can watch the video on how to kiss properly, movie stars are certainly good at it.

Still, kissing is better without:

Onions, tobacco and alcohol;
Witnesses - friends, parents, passers-by;
Bruises, hickeys and scratches;
Tickling, runny nose and herpes.
1. You need to start a kiss with your mouth closed, and when you feel the answer, kiss again. After that, you can decide on a long kiss, while acting slowly. After all, sometimes the guys do not correctly interpret the intentions of the girl and begin to act independently and too boldly. You need to decide for yourself how far you are willing to go this time. Sometimes a short kiss with closed lips is already a great start.
2. After that, you can proceed to the next step - kiss, slightly opening your mouth, paying attention to whether he did the same. There is no need to use the tongue right away, since this is an element of the next stage of the kiss.
3. After you kiss with your mouth open, you can continue to kiss with your tongue. You need to touch the guy's lips with his tip, which will become a kind of signal. If he reciprocates, then he is also ready for such a kiss. Gently and slowly move the tip of your tongue over the guy's lips. It is important that the tongues contact softly and gently. Increase them little by little.

A few rules on how to properly kiss a guy for the first time.

Before you start kissing, light biting is allowed, as a kind of preliminary stage before the kiss. You can go for some trick and offer the guy something tasty before the kiss. But here caution is required.

At the first kiss, you can limit yourself to just touching your lips, that is, without a tongue (a kiss in French). According to polls, it turns out that men like such kisses just like tongue kisses.

Of course, the first kiss requires careful preparation. Pay attention to the freshness of your breath. When brushing your teeth, don't forget your tongue. Refuse before a date from products that have strong odors. Before the kiss, be sure to let the guy know that he is pleasant to you, smile, laugh, hold his hands, put your head on his shoulder.

The most important thing is not to rush into this matter. The best thing you can do is give the guy a signal that is understandable without any words. Let him know what you want and expect. Take his hand and gently pull him towards you. If the guy responds to your signals, then he is ready for what is happening. If he retreats and turns away, then the time for this has not yet come.

The sequence of actions at the first kiss.

During the kiss, you need to pay attention to what effect the hands have. The longer the kiss lasts, the more active the movements of your hands: touch the partner’s shoulders, stroke his back, head. Gentle touches to the face are perfect. The main thing is not to be afraid, kissing a guy for the first time is not at all scary, but very pleasant!

All these rules are quite appropriate for guys.

Many are sure that if people are afraid of something, then there are quite convincing reasons for this, which are quite understandable and understandable to everyone. In addition, specially conducted studies have found that even if a person does not suffer from a certain type of phobia, for example, a fear of heights or darkness, he may well understand a patient who is prone to this disease, and even try to logically justify the cause of his fear. After all, the feeling of fear is known to everyone, and sometimes it is enough to dream up a little to understand what guides an individual who is subject to a certain phobic fear.

But, among the huge, and ever-increasing list of phobias, there are periodically those that cause a complete misunderstanding of others. One example is philemaphobia. In this case, the person is terribly afraid of kisses. Despite the fact that most people love to kiss, philemaphobes in every possible way shy away from such a phenomenon, considering it personally for themselves an absolutely unacceptable occupation. The fact is that during a kiss, those suffering from this phobia experience a feeling of great discomfort. Many philemaphobes are well aware of their inadequacy in this matter, but if they try to overcome their fear, they experience real stress during a kiss, which can unbalance a person for a long time, and only worsen the situation.

If for most people a kiss is a manifestation of tender feelings and a source of pleasure, then the philemaphobe holds a completely opposite opinion. Interesting in itself is the fact that women are more susceptible to the fear of kisses. They can fall in love, have a romantic relationship, flirt, and besides, they are not against sex. But kissing is taboo for them. In itself, the idea that another person (even one who is deeply sympathetic to the philemaphobe) touches his lips, and even more so if his tongue penetrates his mouth, causes shudder and horror. Quite often, these feelings are based on ordinary disgust.

According to psychologists, every phobia is based on a grain of fear embedded in the subconscious even during childhood. In some cases, over time, children's fears simply dissolve and disappear without a trace. But, sometimes it happens that they only hide, at a certain moment fully manifesting themselves, and delivering a lot of psychological problems to a person. One of the causes of philemaphobia that came from childhood is "biting" babies. Sometimes young children do not find a more compelling argument for a peer playing in the same sandbox than an unexpected bite. Such violators are a real problem for kindergarten teachers, and teaching them to behave correctly is not so easy.

In the future, in those children who have suffered from such "attention" of friends, any approach of someone else's mouth causes a feeling of fear, and this state does not weaken even when the person grows up. In adults, the fear of kissing may have other motives. For example, someone fears that he will lose control of his behavior, and a kiss will awaken in him the wild primitive instincts of a male, characterized by sharpness and unbridledness. It is unpleasant for other people that during a kiss there is a violation of his personal space, and this is very important for him. Often, philemaphobia is due to the presence of another fear in a person - itiphallophobia (fear of the appearance of the penis in a state of erection). Also in the complex may be present and hedonophobia (fear of pleasure, as it will be followed by inevitable retribution).

A special category of philemaphobes are people who are afraid of penetration through a kiss of various pathogenic microorganisms, bacteria, infection received from another person. That is, in this case, bacteriophobia is added, and as a result, the fear of kisses turns out to be nothing more than a whole bunch of phobias. On top of that, impressionable and overly emotional people begin to be distrustful of kisses, after watching horror films, when, according to the plot, the kisser turns out to be an alien, and tentacles come out of his mouth.

If desired, those suffering from philemaphobia can hide their personal negative attitude towards kissing almost indefinitely, because for this it is enough not to have intimate relationships, not to fall in love, and so on. It's extremely simple and complex at the same time. Therefore, not everyone can hide their problem. For example, a philemaphobe can overtake if a scene with a kiss suddenly appears in an ordinary film that is not related to eroticism. In this case, the patient has a sharp weakness, his hands begin to tremble, his throat dries up, nausea, dizziness are possible. There is also an excessive separation of sweat, and for some time the person becomes unable to control his own actions. There are symptoms typical of most phobic fears.

Although this phenomenon quickly passes, the nervous system is under great tension and stress, therefore, if the phobia is not treated, after a while the condition may worsen, other, more serious mental disorders will occur. In our time, there are enough techniques to save the patient from irrational fear. Psychotherapy is recognized as one of the most effective ways in the treatment of phobias. Hypnotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy is also used.

A kiss is an incredible sacrament between two people in love, which fills a person with a mass of positive emotions, experiences and feelings. The kiss inspires, makes the heart beat faster, as if a discharge of current passes through the whole body, the knees tremble, and the head is spinning. It seems to lovers that there is no one around them, there is only he, she and their kiss. But before the first kiss, teenagers very often torment themselves with the questions “What to do? How is it right? ”, and, sometimes, with a rather inappropriate experience of“ I'm afraid!

Each of us has faced this problem at least once in our lives. There is nothing terrible and unnatural in this. Such doubts only indicate that a person has a psychological and emotional barrier that is difficult to cross. Excitement in front of something new and unknown is a completely normal human reaction.

What is the reason?

Such situations are associated with mistakes in education, and indicate that the child grew up shy, not self-confident enough. The second reason for complexes and fear about kissing can be called the fact that, being brought up in the family of a child, they did not initiate the basics of relations between boys and girls, or they showed such relations as shameful and forbidden. Often complexes before a kiss occur in those. Who was brought up in an incomplete family or in a family where it is not customary to show a feeling of tenderness to each other.

In this case, the child does not see the manifestations of love between the father and mother, and in the future it becomes strange and unusual for him. And the fear of everything new is a normal psychological reaction. But do not be upset and worry that now you can put an end to kisses, because any complexes and fears can be overcome, you just need to make a little effort.

After all, it happens that you are standing in front of your loved one, you feel incredible tenderness and a desire to kiss, but the body, as if, is in a stupor and does not want to obey ... This problem is very common and not only among teenagers. According to statistics, approximately every second young person experiences this condition, and if, nevertheless, they cross the barrier, they cannot fully relax and enjoy this touching moment.

Create an environment

What to do in such situations? How to overcome your fears and complexes?
To begin with, you need to learn to relax and not focus your thoughts solely on fear and embarrassment before a kiss. To do this, you need to create a comfortable atmosphere around you. You can organize a romantic date, fill the world around you with romance by turning on, for example, suitable music, try to retire or disengage from prying eyes as much as possible. Also, it is important to understand that at such a moment you do not need to try to be perfect, you need to be yourself.

How to kiss?

Many people say that kissing an embarrassed person is the most fun. With a kiss, such a person gradually opens up and releases his complexes and fears, becomes like a flower that blooms in the first rays of the sun. And therefore, once again worry about your shyness is not worth it. On the contrary, it may turn out to be your highlight and conquer your soul mate.

Gradually, you will get rid of your complexes, and you will remember them with a smile. In case of fear of seeming inept and inexperienced, one very important truth should be remembered - there are no universal rules either for technique, or for age when kissing should begin, or for any other criteria. It is right only the way you feel it, as your heart tells you, and all other views on kissing should not bother you much, because a kiss is an activity exclusively for two. That is why you should not try to impress your loved one with incredible techniques and methods that are often written about on forums. This may seem strange and inappropriate, and, accordingly, may scare your partner away from you.

If it has not yet been possible to overcome the embarrassment, there is no need to try to rush things. You can start with friendly kisses on the cheek, kisses at a meeting and parting, and gradually the fear will go away, forgotten, and you will succeed. The main thing is to make sure that your lover also shows sympathy for you and your attempt to show feelings will not seem strange to him.

One of the main ways to ensure sympathy is a long eye contact. If, during pauses in communication, your soul mate looks at you without looking away, then this indicates sympathy. Also, sympathy is also evidenced by how close a person lets you get close to him. If you can be quite a long time at a distance of no more than half a meter from each other, then it means that a person lets you into his personal zone, which means that he trusts you and sympathizes. Poses can also speak of sympathy. If the partner’s arms or legs are crossed, if he is trying in every possible way to protect himself by putting symbolic barriers between you, then that very moment for a kiss has not yet arrived and you need to wait a bit.

Another unspoken rule is that you don't have to ask permission for a kiss. Such a question "in the forehead" can create an awkward situation between you. The partner may be frightened, confused in the answer, and you risk being rejected. If suddenly this happened, do not take it to heart. Perhaps both of you are not yet ready to cross this line and it is worth trying again a little later.
When kissing, the main thing is to make sure that your feelings and desires are in harmony, you don’t need to get hung up on correctness, on how it will look from the outside, the most important thing is to focus on your feelings. If your partner or partner is more experienced in kissing, listen to him.

The main fears of kissing and how to overcome them

Often young people are worried that their kiss may turn out to be unpleasant for a partner because of saliva, because the main goal is to show their feelings, and not “wash” a loved one. To avoid such a situation, immediately before the kiss, it is necessary to swallow the saliva accumulated in the oral cavity and not delay the process too much.

Another common fear is the uncertainty about the duration of the kiss. What should she be? In the Guinness Book of Records, you can see that the longest kiss in the world dragged on for several days. But your goal is not to break the record, and therefore the most optimal kiss duration is about one minute. Don't try to hold your breath while kissing. You need to breathe through your nose.

From this follows another complex before the kiss. Young people do not understand what to do with the nose, whether it will interfere, where to look and whether it is necessary to look at the partner during the kiss, where to hold hands, how to tilt the head ... Such moments go away by themselves when a person stops looking at them focus. The body itself will tell you how to act correctly, the main thing is to let go of thoughts and dissolve in your feelings. You yourself will understand how to act so that both you and your lover are comfortable.

One of the most important complexes and fears of a kiss is the fear of one's inexperience. But even such a disadvantage can be turned into a virtue. You do not need to directly state that you do not know how and are afraid of it. You can turn the situation so that it becomes pleasant for your lover. For example, you can say that you have never met such a person whom you would like to kiss and open your feelings, in this way, but now such a person has appeared and you are glad that the kiss will happen to him, and not to someone else.

Sometimes fears and complexes before a kiss are associated with a situation such as the presence of braces in one of the couple or both at once. This situation is by no means a contraindication for a kiss. To begin with, it is necessary to understand that wearing braces is not a deformity or a physiological defect, but a necessity. Moreover, braces will not need to be worn all your life. Every normal person understands this and will not be disgusted by an overbite plate. An important point before any kiss, and especially if you wear braces, is oral hygiene. This is necessary in order not to bring unnecessary discomfort to either yourself or your partner.

You also need to remember that braces can damage and scratch your lover, so the kiss should not be aggressive or too passionate. It is better that it be as gentle, careful and soft as possible. Gradually, you will get used to kissing with braces, understand how to do it in order to avoid inconvenience, and they will not interfere with you in the future. As you can see, the complex due to wearing a correction plate is caused by the fear that your partner will not accept and understand you. But this fear will go by the wayside if there is complete understanding and mutual support between you. You don't need to be afraid of it.
A few tips to make the kiss memorable.

Many people remember their first kiss with trepidation. This is due to the fact that a person experiences new sensations, moves to a new stage of adult relationships. A kiss is always filled with a lot of emotions and backed up by the release of hormones into the body.
In order not to disappoint yourself and your chosen one, so that the first kiss really turns into a pleasant memory, you can listen to some advice.

First, you need to really make sure that the kiss will happen to the person you want. There should be mutual sympathy between you.

Don't try to kiss if you don't feel the right mood or if something is bothering you. The atmosphere conducive to a kiss should be as relaxed and relaxed as possible. No need to make a kiss a goal, because this is not a duty, but a sincere manifestation of bright feelings. Kissing should be a natural manifestation of instinct, and not a stepping stone to experience.

Also, don't kiss your loved one after taking something for courage. Firstly, one can talk about the dangers of such substances for a very long time, but this is not about that now. Secondly, alcohol, as a rule, liberating a person, dulls his sensitivity, which means that memories of a kiss will remain vague and crumpled. And, thirdly, it may be unpleasant for your partner.

Summing up, you see that the main fears and complexes lie precisely in the unknown. This is quite natural and should not be embarrassed. Everyone goes through this sooner or later. Also, do not focus only on yourself and your feelings.

You need to carefully consider your partner, try to understand his feelings and experiences, because when you kiss, you not only give a share of your tenderness and feelings, but also accept it from your chosen one in the same way. It is necessary to open up and relax as much as possible, remember that in this way you do not develop a technique or try to appear better in the eyes of others, but share the most intimate with your soul mate.

Do not be afraid to show your feelings, listen to yourself and your soul mate, and then your kiss will leave only pleasant and warm memories.

Articles about kissing

Often young girls are afraid of kissing. Most of them are very afraid to be the first to kiss their young people. For example, today you can very often hear from the lips of a girl such words as: I want to kiss a guy, but I'm afraid. How to explain this fear and how to get rid of it?

The main types of fear when kissing and how to overcome them

Fear number one

Some girls believe that by kissing a guy, they can make him feel unpleasant because of saliva. To avoid such situations, before kissing a guy, the girl must swallow the accumulated salivation and in no case delay the time of the kiss itself.

fear number two

Another very common fear is not knowing how long the kissing process should last. That is, the girl is afraid that she will do something wrong, which the guy will not like at all. You shouldn't worry about this. Everyone has the right to choose the duration of kisses individually. But in principle, the optimal time for a kiss is between fifty and sixty seconds. In addition, in the process of kissing, it is not recommended to try to hold your breath. The girl's breathing should be through the nasal cavity.

fear number three

The third equally important fear of kissing is the fear that the girl's nose will interfere. Many of the fair sex are wondering: and do not make a mistake. After all, girls who have never kissed before do not even understand how to behave during a kiss, where their eyes should be directed, how and where to hold their hands, in which direction to bow their heads and much more. But overcoming their fears, the girls soon understand what guys like in kisses and how to kiss a guy if you are afraid. And this is not surprising, because during kissing your body itself tells you how and where to kiss a guy. The only thing a girl should do is try to get all thoughts out of her head and completely surrender to her feelings. In general, the girl herself will understand how to kiss a guy and make him more than pleasant and comfortable.

fear number four

The most important fear of kissing appears against the background of the inexperience of a young girl. But the lack of experience should by no means be considered a disadvantage, because there are ways to turn this into a huge plus for a girl. Of course, it is categorically not recommended to immediately tell your boyfriend that you are afraid of kissing or simply do not know how to do it. You can organize everything in such a way that you can make your beloved happy.

Imagine that a girl has never kissed before and now the moment has come when she gets a chance to do it for the first time. In order not to look clumsy and inexperienced in the eyes of a guy, the girl should be told that before she had never met a person whom she wants to kiss and completely open up to him. Such actions on the part of the young lady will lead to the fact that the guy will not only not know that she is kissing for the first time, but will also be very happy with the fact that for her he is more than just a young man. The girl will show by this that he is dear to her and she is really in love with him.

fear number five

Often, behind the fear of kissing lies something quite predictable. For example, if a girl wears braces, then very often she is afraid to kiss a guy because braces can cause negative emotions in a young man. According to the girl, the guy will consider her ugly. But in reality this is far from the case. If a young person is quite adequate, then he understands that this is a necessary measure. He will not treat the record with disgust, but most likely will simply remain silent. But a girl wearing braces should remember that when kissing, there is a chance of scratching her partner's tongue. To prevent this from happening, she needs to give up aggressive or too. It is better to do it more gently, softly and carefully.

Most people remember with rapture how they kissed for the first time. All this is connected with new sensations that a person experiences for the first time, as well as with the fact that he, as it were, rises to the next level of personal relationships.

Any kiss is fraught with a lot of emotions, so when you kiss, hormones are released into the body. In order for the first kiss to be remembered for a lifetime and bring only positive emotions and real pleasure to the young girl and her lover, the girl should follow some tips:

Before kissing a guy, a girl must understand whether she really wants it or not and whether this is the right person. There must be sincere sympathy between young people;
You should not kiss if the girl feels some kind of internal anxiety or is in a bad mood;
The environment where your lips merge should be saturated with a relaxed and relaxed atmosphere;
In no case should you set a kiss as the goal of something, therefore it should not be an obligation, but a sincere manifestation of tender feelings;
You need to kiss a guy not in order to gain more experience, but only if you really want it;

Under no circumstances should you kiss if before that the girl drank alcohol for courage. Do not forget that alcohol-containing drinks contribute to the emancipation of a person. Alcohol is able to dull the sensitivity of a person, so there is a high probability that the kiss will be forgotten or memories of it will be rather vague. In addition, after drinking alcohol before a kiss, a girl may run into discontent from her young man. Agree, not many people like to kiss if the partner smells of alcohol.

Summing up, we can understand that most of the fears and complexes are hidden just in the unknown, that is, the girls are simply afraid of what will follow the kiss and how it will generally happen. Every day on the Internet you can find a phrase like: I want to kiss a guy, but I'm afraid. Such sensations are quite common, so you should not be afraid or ashamed of this. Every person has to deal with kissing at some point. And I also want to add that a girl should never think only about her feelings and desires. Then all fears will disappear by themselves.

The first kiss is almost impossible to forget. Although in fact, awkwardness, worry about a possible failure, is most remembered. Why are people so worried about this event? How to overcome your constraint and decide on such a step? And most importantly - how to learn to kiss?

How to learn to kiss for the first time

The biggest reason for fear is the possibility of doing something wrong. However, each cause for fear has its own original basis. Most often it is associated with the largest complexes. A person fears failure because of such thoughts:

“I can be abandoned, rejected, left alone”(fear of loneliness, painful attachment);
“He/she will tell everyone about what I did not succeed”(dependence on public opinion);
“He/she will find out that I am incompetent, will start laughing at me”(low self-esteem);
“I can't do everything right. There will be inaccuracies and mistakes in my movements. I still have little experience”(excessive perfectionism);
“No one will want to kiss me later”(fear of the future, exaggeration, unhealthy maximalism);
“I will start laughing, crying or acting strange, repulsive”(rejection of their emotions, their suppression, instead of control).

To solve deep problems, it is better to turn to a psychologist. However, it is still possible to reduce experiences so that they do not interfere with enjoying the process, feelings, without the help of a specialist.

How to overcome your fear

Conventionally, there are two methods of dealing with fear. Each of them is effective alone, but in combination they work even better. The following are the main principles of these methods.

Physical

Concentration on breathing. In a stressful environment, a person begins to breathe intermittently, superficially. If he tries to restore deep measured breathing, he will feel better.
Removing the block. Nervousness makes the abdominal muscles tense and causes them to spasm. Because of this, there are unpleasant sensations (“sucking in the pit of the stomach”, nausea, rumbling of the stomach, bloating). To avoid them, it is enough to relax the point in the center under the ribs.
Tremor reduction. Trembling and/or sweaty palms are a common sign of an agitated state. To reduce the level of this phenomenon, you can strain your hands and fingers as much as possible for a few seconds, and then sharply relax them.
Stuttering. You don’t want to mumble, mumble something out of place, stutter or stutter in front of your passion. Therefore, before each answer, it is better to wait one and a half to two seconds. This will be enough for the brain to group the information and form an adequate response.

Psychological

Interlocutor's thoughts. If this is the first kiss, then for the partner it is also exciting. And even for an experienced person in this matter. It is enough to realize the fact that the couple is also experiencing some confusion, worries, and it will become easier.
Acceptance of any outcome. Often, the fears in the head turn out to be much larger and more terrifying than they really are. You can consider your fears and make sure that they are not fatal, and time does not stop running because of them.
Confession. A short phrase “I'm a little worried” will help relieve tension, and for both lovers. Many consider such frankness quite sweet. The same sincerity makes others open up, show trust, and generally become closer.
Confidence. The most difficult, but most effective way is to increase self-esteem. Loving yourself makes it easier to respond to stress. The path to adequate self-perception is long and thorny. However, even attempts, small steps in this direction will be tangible.

Where fears come from and how to deal with them is already clear. But how to learn the technique of kissing? Explanations in words are not always clear. Moreover, sometimes they are even more confusing. Then what are the ways to comprehend this art?

How to learn to kiss properly

Watch videos

A storehouse of knowledge in this matter is rightfully considered YouTube. It is enough to drive in the request “how to kiss properly” - and the site will give out thousands of video tips. A plus such a method in its clarity, because in the commercials the kiss is shown close up, almost in a section. Although such rendered 3D graphics clips certainly exist.

Main minus- lack of practice, tactile sensation. But this can be easily dealt with by resorting to the following recommendations.

Ask for help from experienced friends

Older brothers, sisters, already “experienced” friends can come to the rescue. It is enough to ask them to demonstrate in detail a kiss with their couples. Or at least just show the basic movements of the lips, tongue, if the “teachers” are not in a relationship with anyone.

Better don't ask show off the technique. This, of course, will add experience, but, firstly, all the charm of the first time will disappear, and, secondly, awkwardness will appear and then it will be difficult to look into the eyes of a friend or acquaintance.

Use your fingers

This technique is quite simple, practical, but very effective. Procedure:

leave the index and middle fingers straightened, and bend the rest to the palm;
slightly spread the straightened fingers to the sides - just a little bit, so that there is a small gap between them, equating to slightly parted lips;
practice light kisses, biting. Try to gently lick the skin, checking if too much saliva remains on it;
try to gently close your lip with your fingers, imitating the movements of your partner;
barely pushing the pad of the thumb between two straight lines is a “model” of the tip of the tongue on which you can train;
if this is not enough, you can bend the little finger of the other hand and use it instead of the thumb, adjusting the degree of bending so that it mimics the width of the tongue.

The method is good in that it includes theory and practice, is carried out on its own, does not require an abstruse approach. A drop of imagination, a pinch of effort - and everything will work out.

Use the right products

The most common, yet "old-fashioned" method especially respects tomatoes. However, the skin of this fruit do not like on the lips. It is smooth, while the lips can be rough. The skin easily glides over the tomato, but with real contact, the lips rub, if they are not licked, they can stick to each other.

Based on this, it is better to use ripe juicy peach. It is rough, softer externally and internally, vulnerable to rough movements, and also does not contain small seeds or seeds. It is enough to bite off a small piece, forming a small notch, similar to an ajar mouth.

The main thing- do not overdo it and do not get an allergy.

Practice in front of a mirror

The kiss requires close enough contact, so the partner will not be able to see the whole picture of the action. However, he will notice jaw movements, head tilts, facial expressions in general.

To make the expression say " I am the most kissable person in the world!", but not " Horror what this first time! Now I'm going to faint!”, you can practice in front of the mirror.

First, the skill is honed with open eyes so that you can follow everything. Then, when the actions become more or less automatic, the eyes are closed, and all the steps taken are played “blindly”.

Rely on nature

Sometimes it's easy enough let go and let the event happen on its own. Reflexes will prompt the base, and then it remains only to adjust to the movements of the pair or simply start mirroring them.

If this step seems too hard, maybe the first kiss is better. postpone. And time can be spent on rapprochement with a partner, overcoming a period of acute awkwardness. After crossing such a milestone, it will be much easier to decide on such an important romantic step.

What to do if the first attempt fails

Understand that life is not over, the sun still rises and sets, and the earth rotates in the same direction. However, it will be easier to endure unpleasant emotions in solitude or with a close friend / relative / dog.
Don't promise about retries. Perhaps not immediately and not even with the same person, but everything will work out. And in a year, if not much earlier, the memory of this incident will only cause a smile.
Analyze, something went wrong. Maybe it's inexperience or inattention. And sometimes the reason for failure is the lack of the same experience with a partner.
remember reaction couples. If a person openly began to ridicule, then most likely he tried to cover up his own complexes with this laugh. If the partner encouraged, reassured or continued to try to kiss, then not everything is so bad. Gathering up the courage to meet him again is the best solution.

This article describes how to learn to kiss, what to do in nervous situations. However, stories about the first kiss are numerous, unlike. Someone spends weeks studying this art and still gets into a mess. And someone does not bother about this at all and just enjoys the pleasant excitement that arises before one of the most romantic events of their lives. After all, the main thing is not technique, but lively emotions between lovers.